Tuesday, November 16, 2010


Children deserve as much respect as any person. Their feelings are just as important as ours and they trust us to listen to them, guide them and help them. When we give a child the attention that he or she deserves we teach them mindfulness and that everyone's opinions and feelings count (even if you don't agree with them).

Mindfulness is paying attention. Mindfulness is also taking care of what is right in front of you, tending to it and nurturing it. As a great teacher told me this weekend, "Mindfulness is a floodlight." It is not just a spotlight. We have to see the big picture with big mind, not just what we want to see with our small mind.

When Z gets upset it reminds me to stop dead in my tracks and give him the respect he deserves. Even when his anger or sadness is inconvenient (say in the middle of the grocery store or when I am cooking), he deserves respect and attention. When I fail to give it to him it blows up in both of our faces and we both feel worse. Respect begets trust and shows love - that is what being a parent is all about.

I think I should try this with the big folks too.